On Raising a Daughter

Parenting is one of life’s most transformative experiences. For Man O, it means talking about myself in the third person. Not really. It’s more a unique opportunity to blend my personal philosophies on how to live a good life with a worldly perspective. After all, my kid was born “Baby O!”

I’ve had readers/listeners send emails & DMs saying they hope that I raise my daughter to be strong & independent. Their need to send me those messages stemmed from what I’ve said and written about male/female differences.

I usually tell them I appreciate their perspective, and thank them for their note.

But “strong” & “independent” don’t crack the Top 10 qualities we hope to instill in our daughter. I’d rather her be: warm, kind, confident, curious, generous, resilient

Drawing from Lady O & I’s personal journeys and insights, we hope our daughter lives with intentionality. I want her to intuit the importance of developing meaningful connections. And that starts at home.

What I don’t want is for her to be an actress who pretends to care about stuff beyond her control. We see so much fakery in the world today. And I believe fakery is a facade that’ll attract the wrong people—who will invariably want her to join their bubble. Although, candidly, that bubble would likely be pierced by me—because, like the richest man in the world, I want her to care about the reality of goodness, not the perception of it.

Besides, strength & independence might have your daughter someday holding signs at rallies protesting imaginary things instead of caring for children.

Intentional Parenting: A Foundation for Growth

My approach to parenting prioritizes quality time, clear communication, and shared experiences. I aim to be present in the moment, whether we’re playing or having meaningful conversations.

I strive to create an environment where she feels supported to explore her interests and make mistakes without fear of judgment.

Again, drawing parallels from my own life, I’ll highlight the importance of autonomy. Just as I take calculated risks and make investments, I want to foster that same independence and assertiveness in my kid.

This could involve allowing her to make her own decisions, learning from inevitable failures, and developing critical thinking skills. Research supports this approach. Authoritative parenting—characterized by warmth and structure—promotes self-reliance and likability in kids.

Power of Connection in Parenting

Let’s talk about the power of connection. I’ll encourage my child to journal to deepen her understanding of herself and her relationships. Not to mention writing about your experiences can be therapeutic and make you a better communicator.

Better communication skills will enable more open dialogue and give us more to talk about.

Former podcast guest, Brandon Ruttley, sent me a book when my daughter was born called Strong Fathers Raise Strong Daughters by Meg Meeker. One of the key takeaways from the book is the importance of improving your communication skills. We often think of communication skills as being more articulate or having an extensive vocabulary, but it’s so much more than that (we discuss here).

Connection isn’t only about spending time together—it’s about understanding your kid’s emotions and validating their feelings. That’s what I intend to do anyway, as I try to build a bridge of trust bigger than the Lake Pontchartrain Causeway.

Parenting with love and affection is also important. I see parents striving to provide a nurturing environment filled with emotional support, but it can be overdone. In recent years, we’ve too often been forced to live with the results of parents coddling their kids.

I’m all for “I love you’s,” verbal affirmations and physical gestures like hugs to make a child feel valued and secure. I do those things everyday, in fact. But too much concern for their emotional well-being—especially spending money to achieve that well-being—tends to produce an entitled brat accustomed to getting everything they want. And that’s not good.

Parenting with a Global Perspective

As someone who’s traveled extensively, I’ll show (and tell) her the value of being exposed to people from diverse backgrounds & cultures. They will have different ideas to broaden her worldview.

I could argue that raising a more worldly young person would better equip them with empathy, adaptability, and an aversion to materialism. My girl’s already been enrolled in Spanish-only daycares in Antigua & Houston, and an international daycare in Prague where she heard lots of languages.

Some might consider daycare to be outsourcing the raising of your child. Far from it. Mom & Dad need quality time too—which is important because I’m aware that I’m setting an example for how she’ll expect to be treated by her love interest someday.

Personal Finance, Freedom & Structure

My kid will be granted freedom and structure. We’ll establish clear boundaries while encouraging exploration—the sort of wisdom my friend Parfait discusses on his New Dad Order Youtube channel.

The girl formerly known as Baby O will be taught financial discipline—how to set goals while allowing for flexibility.

I discussed the methodology I plan to use to teach her about personal finance in a solo podcast episode last year. The episode is only 28 minutes. But here’s a preview in case you miss it:

• She’ll learn profits are better than wages
• She’ll be given a bike to ride and a bike to rent
• On her bike, she’ll have an odometer and get paid .$25/mile
• Money she asks me to save & invest for her will have a 100% return

Parenting as Personal Growth

Parenting isn’t just about guiding children—the parent grows too. You learn patience you didn’t know you were capable of. You learn to love in a way you didn’t think possible.

You learn adaptability by trying to be as productive as you were before kids in tight little windows of time. All despite getting less sleep.

By the way, as a champion of personal growth & self-reflection, I encourage parents to journal too.

A Legacy of Love

Parenting is an opportunity to leave a legacy. If leaving a legacy isn’t your thing, consider parenting your best opportunity to change the world. Not by spending money, but through love, meaningful relationships and passing on whatever wisdom you’ve acquired throughout your years.

By being intentional, connected, and open to learning, parents can empower their children to grow into confident individuals who make positive contributions to the world. Just like you.

I don’t view parenting as a challenge. Raising children is a rewarding journey filled with opportunities for growth—for both you and your child.